I am suffering from crazy jet lag right now. I spent the whole week in Albuquerque, New Mexico for work. Ive never been but heard it was a fun city. I didnt get to see too much of the city because I was working the whole time, but what I did see was just ok. I missed the Balloon festival by a week. Darn
At the end of the trip, I was READY to come home, even if it is just for the weekend. Yes, I am traveling again starting next week for the rest of the month. I am working two shows up in Louisville and going to Chicago for my cousins wedding. Come Halloween I am going to be drained. No time for that though because first and second week is one of my large shows and around Thanksgiving is when I go into full planning mode for my BIG show in January. I am not looking forward to that at all. I know the client does not like me (they seem to dislike everyone that has been in my position), so I requested today to be moved to different shows. Mainly because of the attitudes towards me and because in July I started taking my frustrations home and when I admitted that to my friend at work, I broke down crying. That is so unfair to everyone and work should be left at work.
So now that busy season is in full swing, wedding planning isnt. Or it has slowed significantly. I am so grateful that both my parents want to help pay for this (even though I begged against it), but I am still without a budget. When I started making a lot of progress in planning, poop hit the fan for my mom with my siblings. My sister’s lame ass ex-boyfriend had his mom break up with her for him and with her lease ending, my mom has been trying to help her through. She and my stepdad are also dealing with custody issues with my brother (his mother really screwed up) and its been overly stressful for both. I took a step back from my needs so they could all get through this.
Today I talked to my mom and I can tell she is not in the mood to talk wedding. I brought it up slightly and that is where the conversation ended. I tried to call my dad just to see what he would say because I REALLY need to come up with a budget, and he did not answer (which is typical) and I probably wont hear from him until I head up there in two weeks. At that moment I wanted to say F this and lets go to the beach and elope. If no one else is going to care, why should I? I am doing this 100% alone. My friends arent into this, my family, why should I care? (Selfish? No doubt, but planning a wedding is HARD work and I feel like no one really cares).
Sorry. I am so frustrated right now. I have a meeting with my first caterer next week and I am going alone. DJ, Ill probably go alone. DIY projects, alone. I am hoping when Matt gets home from work, we can sit down and talk about the check list. I dont know what to ask him to do or what he will want to do. I do know I dont want to hear “we have plenty of time” or “if you cant plan a wedding in two months, there is something wrong.” #^$*#&@#^#^@&#^@&#*&#&#
So lets talk about the fun part of the planning:
I made my bouquet! I want to show you the whole thing, but I think it will be fun to leave a few things a mystery, dont you? Here is a sneak peak:
Total cost: $39. Not bad, eh?
I cant stop looking at it and the best part is I will have it forever! Of course I will share with you how I made the pearl clusters (easy project).
Whats next: I am meeting with the caterer next week and I have to take more time off until I am back in town. 8 months until the wedding, but really 5 months left to plan.
Good news: I had my feet looked at last week and he said I do not have a neuroma, but damaged soft tissue. He shot me up with some cortizone and my left foot feels MUCH better. I am going back next week to do the same to my right and take a look at my running shoes. I am THISMUCH closer to running again! I CANNOT WAIT!
Time to get back to “what questions to ask your caterer” research. A hug to everyone that survived wedding planning